As The Sound of Music would say… “these are a few of my favourite things.” But unfortunately for me my nearly 30-year-old body flatly disagrees.
I never could have imagined that impact these things would have on my body throughout my 20’s. I’m still shy of turning the big 3-0 (only a few months, but it still totally still not there yet) and I already struggle with all sorts of ongoing self-inflicted issues as a result of the choices I made when I was younger and reckless. I kind of want to slap young me. Or hug her until she stops struggling.
When we’re young, wild and free we live with wild abandon. We don’t tend to think about the long-term consequences our choices and actions will have on our 30, 40 and 50-year-old selves. We think about where to party that night… or how hard that University class was (because we were hungover). In fact, I remember the last thing I wanted to be lectured about in my late teens and early 20’s was the long-term effects of… anything, really. I partied. I made poor decisions. I felt as though I was invincible. I was also very selfish and stupid.
For this, I would like to issue a formal apology to my body.
I am sorry. I’m sorry for abusing you and taking you for granted for so many years. I’m sorry for putting holes in you and tattooing you and making you ‘so unique and cool’ because I believed that you were mine and I could do whatever I damn well pleased. I’m sorry for being toxic and hurting you and I’m ready to change. Please forgive me.
Okay – that feels better. But listen, I’m not saying someone is a bad person for living in the moment or ‘enjoying life’ as someone who is young and independent; but man do I wish I had spoken less and listened more (and listened with intent) when people told me to slow down, take care of my body and think about what I was doing to it. I wish I had weighed the consequences a little heavier.. and taken just a little bit longer to make some of the rash decisions I did.
I am now (finally) acknowledging the need to look after myself better… to take more care of the body that has seen me through everything and begin to give back to it in ways that I never have before. I am going to treat my body like the temple of life that it is by nourishing it and loving it with intent. I will start by drinking more water. And switching to decaf. But seriously…
What do you do to show your body love? Do you exercise, take minerals/vitamins or meditate? Do you believe it is more important to nourish and heal the body from the inside out? I’d love to hear some of the ways people practice self-care and invest in the longevity of their bodies.
(wise) Windy May
Blessings are not few and far between – there is an abundance of blessings and good fortune in each and every one of our lives. Sometimes they come in the most subtle ways – as people passing through or as small gestures or day to day victories. Sometimes they’re masked as something completely unrecognizable only to reveal themselves in retrospect. Like when something that you think you want to happen doesn’t work out – initially you’re disappointed (sometimes angry)… but eventually you heal. You reflect. And sometimes (hopefully) you realize that everything worked out in the best way possible, exactly how it was meant to – and that’s the whole idea.
Over the past 6-7 months I have worked hard to be open to receiving blessings (or signs, or messages, or whatever you label them) in any form – and trusting that everything… and I mean EVERYTHING is happening for a reason. Growing up I had an extremely hard time letting go of control. I struggled with OCD behavior (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) and my world would absolutely crumble if something didn’t go as I had planned or anticipated. It began at such an early age that I grew to live with it… no matter how unhealthy it was for me. It wasn’t until the past couple of years that I began to explore this behavior and challenge it.
I guess that’s why so many people struggle with the idea of ‘everything happens for a reason’… because more often than not, you have to let go of control and just TRUST that everything happens in its own time and for a divine purpose. For me, one of my major ‘life lessons’ thus far has been about accepting the fact that, while I have complete control over my actions, responses and decisions, there is something in this world that is bigger than me. Bigger than you. Bigger than our lifetime and our mental capacity.
It’s a scary thought; abandoning our controlling, small-minded selves and trusting that we’re in good hands. People aren’t comfortable with the idea – and I don’t blame them. Who wants to feel like they have no say in their own fate? But let’s be clear – that’s not what this is.. this is about knowing we can determine the outcome of our lives through our decision making and thoughts, but, no matter what we decide, it will always fall within our life plan.
It brings me great peace knowing this. In fact, it makes me more consciously aware and motivated to grow than I have ever felt before. Knowing that I’m on the right path – listening to my intuition – and enjoying the journey is a completely rewarding and healthy place to be for me. Right now.
There’s something to be said for boring. This is what my stepdad said the other day over lunch and it made me chuckle. He said that as he’s gotten older he has developed a greater appreciation for the uneventful things in life. I could never understand this growing up… or even throughout my 20’s… but now… now I understand.
There is certainly something to be said for boring.
For my entire life I have felt like I wasn’t ‘doing enough’. If I had a moment of peace I would get restless, if not physically than mentally. My mind would race… thought after thought until I had either exhausted myself or worked myself into such an anxious ball of thought-yarn that I couldn’t be undone. After years of being or feeling busy it’s easy to forget what it’s like to not be busy and to just be present.
Mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually still in a moment. Not to be confused with stagnant – I’ve been there and it’s not a good place to be. But I believe that it is possible to be growing and changing on many different levels in the inside while just enjoying a moment in a calm, peaceful manner here in the physical world.
Boring always had this negative connotation attached to it for me. As a kid boring to me meant slow… uneventful… quiet… even uncomfortable. As a teenager I denied boring like the class nerd. If I found myself alone, I’d fill my space and time with people or things that I didn’t necessarily need or want… just so I wouldn’t be alone and bored. Now, as a young woman just shy of her 30’s, boring has an entirely new meaning. I don’t love it (yet) and haven’t fully embraced it, but it’s no longer uncomfortable for me to sit alone, quiet and with my thoughts.
And boring isn’t just about minutes or hours… but, as my stepdad said, an exceptionally quiet life is something different. It can be so peaceful without chaos. A time of reflection and ease.
Sometimes I need to visually picture myself somewhere in order to experience peace and relaxation. We all have that ‘safe place’ we can go to in our minds that help us to escape from reality even if for a fleeting moment. For me, this place is a beach. But not just any beach – it’s a specific beach in Ontario where I spent a lot of time growing up with my Dad. The sandy shore seemed endless and the lake itself had sand bars… you could wade out into the water for ever and it would only be up to your thighs. We would spend days here camping out in his old 50’s chrome bus that had been converted into a motorhome. It was the coolest place on earth as a kid and really brings back a lot of happy memories for me now as a woman.
Do you have a peaceful place? A happy moment, location or memory that you recall when you need a moment of peace and calming?